I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
3pm strippers are depressing
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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