To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
barbara walters just said penis...
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
