I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
