Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
