So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
