I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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