i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
