We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I checked into jail on foursquare
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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