She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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