So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
