I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
