I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
