i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I got inside last night via doggy door
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize