At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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