She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
We got so high we made milksteak
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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