And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Four minutes until I can fart!
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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