you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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