Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
