Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
