kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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