We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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