we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
