My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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