when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
