At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
