She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize