Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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