Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
