he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
