Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
