Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
