Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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