PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
