Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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