Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
