is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
