2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Sext me about skeletons
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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