? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
