When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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