We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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