girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
