i think my tv is drunk
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
