Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
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