Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
