Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
