I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
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