the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
