So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
