I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
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