So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
A bitchslap is in order.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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