My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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